When my mother-in-law, Linda, handed me a “special gift” at my daughter Christina’s first birthday, I didn’t expect the deep betrayal it would represent. Ever since my husband Jake and I used a surrogate—my friend Cheryl—Linda’s subtle digs had slowly turned into open attempts to rewrite the narrative of our family. Her warm welcome when we first met had long faded, replaced by veiled insults and backhanded comments about motherhood and biology.
Our infertility journey was heartbreaking, and surrogacy with Cheryl gave us renewed hope. But Linda was fixated on the idea of biology. When she learned Cheryl was both our egg donor and surrogate, she treated her like the real mother, constantly sidelining me. At the gender reveal party, she toasted Cheryl as “the mother of my grandchild,” steering photo ops and social moments to exclude me entirely.
The worst came after Christina was born. Linda brought a photographer to the hospital without our consent, orchestrating photos that framed Cheryl and Jake as a perfect couple and parents. She shared these publicly, calling them a “loving pair of parents” while I was cropped out or ignored. Cheryl was mortified by the attention and began distancing herself.
But Linda’s behavior escalated at Christina’s first birthday. She gave me a framed illustration of Jake, Cheryl, and Christina—posed in front of our house, with me erased. When confronted, she doubled down, calling me “like the babysitter.” That’s when I asked her to leave.
Jake stood by me. “You protected our family,” he said—and I finally felt seen.